So, your child has been gone all day. Your day has gone well and you even make it to the bus stop to meet said child before the big yellow bus squeals to a halt. You give big hugs and exchange kisses (He's 7. This WILL end soon I'm certain) and chat about his day as you walk back home. All is sunny, happy and loving. A Hallmark movie.
Until, you open loving child's daily folder and....what's this extra piece of paper on the wrong side of the folder? Hmm. A note. From the teacher. Mr. and Mrs. Pink, Mini#1 has not been following directions...not using inside voice in cafeteria...talking in hallway after warnings...please speak to him about the importance of following the school expectations. Good grief! Hallmark movie is quickly a thing of the far past. We had the "talk" to end all talks, did his homework together, and then I made him write sentences. I WILL LISTEN TO MY PARENTS AND MY TEACHERS. No play outside, no TV and then more talking. I don't know why I imposed the sentence punishment. I remember my mom doing this once, but I was an angel (well, for the most part) in school. I never had notes sent home! Mini#1 is only in 2nd grade. I really don't want to think the kid has ADHD, but I think the kid has ADHD! It's driving me crazy. He can't sit still for homework. He remembers one task if I give him two or three to complete. Is this boys? Is it ADHD? Whatever it is it's tough. He's a good kid, but his lack of listening is really a concern for me these days.
And, can you believe this? After he wrote an entire page of sentences he gave it to me. I asked him, "What did you just write?" Do you know he couldn't remember???? He said "I will not...I forgot the next part." Once I supplied "LISTEN!" he suddenly remembered the rest. I think my head spinning around while steam blew from my ears triggered his memory. The best part of this whole situation is that we have parent/teacher conferences on Thursday. He's doing so well academically, but it's the behavior area I better be prepared for on Thursday. Most days I still feel like a kid myself. When exactly did I sign up to become a 38 year old responsible parent in charge of this hall talking, outside voice speaking, ants in the pants 7 year old? Anyone have any advice? Books? Websites? Medications (for me or mini#1)? I think we need all of it!
Until, you open loving child's daily folder and....what's this extra piece of paper on the wrong side of the folder? Hmm. A note. From the teacher. Mr. and Mrs. Pink, Mini#1 has not been following directions...not using inside voice in cafeteria...talking in hallway after warnings...please speak to him about the importance of following the school expectations. Good grief! Hallmark movie is quickly a thing of the far past. We had the "talk" to end all talks, did his homework together, and then I made him write sentences. I WILL LISTEN TO MY PARENTS AND MY TEACHERS. No play outside, no TV and then more talking. I don't know why I imposed the sentence punishment. I remember my mom doing this once, but I was an angel (well, for the most part) in school. I never had notes sent home! Mini#1 is only in 2nd grade. I really don't want to think the kid has ADHD, but I think the kid has ADHD! It's driving me crazy. He can't sit still for homework. He remembers one task if I give him two or three to complete. Is this boys? Is it ADHD? Whatever it is it's tough. He's a good kid, but his lack of listening is really a concern for me these days.
And, can you believe this? After he wrote an entire page of sentences he gave it to me. I asked him, "What did you just write?" Do you know he couldn't remember???? He said "I will not...I forgot the next part." Once I supplied "LISTEN!" he suddenly remembered the rest. I think my head spinning around while steam blew from my ears triggered his memory. The best part of this whole situation is that we have parent/teacher conferences on Thursday. He's doing so well academically, but it's the behavior area I better be prepared for on Thursday. Most days I still feel like a kid myself. When exactly did I sign up to become a 38 year old responsible parent in charge of this hall talking, outside voice speaking, ants in the pants 7 year old? Anyone have any advice? Books? Websites? Medications (for me or mini#1)? I think we need all of it!
7 comments:
Oh my goodness I see my future here! My son got in trouble today for not listening to his teacher (and he's in preschool!!). Great idea making him write the sentences!
I think you're stressing a little too much here. Love your child and talk to him. Maybe he has something bothering him that he hasn't told you or Mr Pink. Maybe spend some more time with Mr Pink and tell he and everyone in the house how much you love them. Maybe the stress level is flowing over to Mini#1. Just a thought.
Oh God. Landon is two and he does some of this! LOL! I think this is kjust boys and growing up. He'll get it, he's just excited to be in school!
You might not agree with me, but I think that schools inherently favor "girl" behavior. Meaning girls tend to have a very different energy than boys and teachers want boys to act like girls. Yes, boys can listen, they can stop talking when warned, and they can follow directions. But I think that at young age (what, 7?) it is much harder for boys than girls. They've done research where they find that boys and girls LEARN differently...there are some public schools (I forget the state of the article I read) that are now doing single sex classes in math and finding that girls' scores come up but so do boys if the way the subject is taught differs.
This is not to excuse poor behavior, but go easy on your boy. He is only 7 years old and he will make mistakes. I think you handled the punishment really well. My 6yo hasn't been in trouble at school yet (but he's only been in KG for a month so give it time!) but I can see where sometimes he has trouble following simple instructions (this morning I had to say "put your shoes on" at least 4 times).
Go easy on yourself. You're a good mother - you know you are!
Oh gosh. Those days are rough. ESPECIALLY when you're coldcocked with it. ha. Just having a great day, being supermom, everyone loves eachother, runs off the bus and gives you a big kiss...oh, life is pefect. Then BLAM!! It hits you. Right out of nowhere. Eh, it happens. You're still supermom and he's still a sweetie, but he's a B O Y. They are just different. I have two like that, but only one ADHD. You'll know the difference. Believe me...you'll know and the teacher will know. Just go with your gut.
Now, go fix a yummy glass of wine(aka-mommy medicine) and let it go . You're a great Mommy and it will all work out. You'll have more gray hair, but it will all work out. ;) hugs...
~Belle
Oh, I forgot about the dreaded sentence writing...I remember having to write "I will not pass notes in class" once...WOW, memories! Hang in there and hopefully everything will work out.
Anonymous- I didn't post this but I did ask him if something was wrong or bothering him. When Mr. Pink got home he did the same (unprovoked)and I happened to walk in when he was asking #1 so then we had a joint conversation. And, yes, don't think I haven't thought about the stress being a cause for his behavior, but he had similar issues last year when all was "calm" in our household. I think it is a boy thing a lot of the time. Rest assured though that they are told they are loved daily, if not hourly, when they are home and the kids tell us as well. Just felt like I needed to respond to your comment.
momx2- I agree with you. It seems boys get a bad wrap the second they enter school! And it's well documented that girls mature quicker than boys so that's another issue.
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